Greetings from China! So far I’ve been here five days and, as predicted, blog-wise I’ve been less productive than could have been hoped. I’m here primarily for work purposes, but a lot of the time is set aside waiting for our China-based tool-makers to make some adjustments to some tooling, but it turns out that I’ve had plenty of work to be getting on with, so the stack of films I brought with me haven’t really garnered a whole lot of attention, and neither has the wad of notes from previously viewed movies. Instead I’ve been up late working, some days I haven’t actually left the hotel, and when I do it’s like walking out of a fridge and into an oven, because bloody hell is it hot here. Like unbearably hot. I went for a stroll today and sweated through my t-shirt in minutes. Plus I’m pretty terrified of getting lost here, as I the only Mandarin I know is “nǐ hǎo”, which means “hello”, so I can’t really rely on anyone to give me directions. Thus much of the local culture has passed me by, not that there’s a great deal to do around these parts anyway as it’s mostly factories, hotels, offices and the standard small shops that crop up around those locales. The company I’m visiting has taken me out a couple of times, and last night I ate about half my weight in lobster (actually crayfish I think, but they call them lobster here), which was delicious, but I feel with lobster the actual meat isn’t worth the hassle of getting to it, plus there was a TV playing throughout the meal showing the whole cooking process, starting with the carefree crustaceans merrily swimming and scrabbling their way around until they’re caught, cooked and served. I’m pretty sure in a steak restaurant they don’t show documentaries about cows whilst you eat, so that was a little off-putting. Still, tasted good though.
I have watched a few films since I’ve been here though, mostly in the background whilst getting on with other things, and I watched a few films before heading here, and some on the plane, so there’s plenty to talk about this week. I also made the mistake of finally starting to watch The Wire and bringing the first season with me (Aisha decided all the characters swear too much for her to watch past episode two), so almost every time I sit down to watch something I can’t resist another episode of that instead. Damn it’s good. More on that once I’ve finished the season. Oh, and the worst thing about being here, other than spending two weeks practically alone and with no-one to hold a full conversation with, is the internet restrictions. I’m amazed that WordPress is still operational, given that Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Youtube and Blogspot are all out of action. The worst is Google, which takes out all it’s subsidiaries too, so no Google Maps, and no Gmail, not even on my phone. I use three Gmail accounts on a regular basis – all the organising I do for the LAMB and the Lambcast is on there – so this is getting unbearable. Plus, I missed this week’s Great British Bake Off! Anyway, here’s what I’ve watched in the past week:
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Tag Archives: A Bug’s Life
Top 10… Movie Spiders
So apparently all I’ve got time to write at the moment is my weekly top 10 lists. Sorry about that, I’ll get back onto the reviews in good time. I’m especially annoyed because this year I was planning on celebrating Hitchcoctober, which of course would have been dedicated to reviewing as many Hitchcock films as possible, but as I still haven’t moved yet and my girlfriend probably doesn’t want to be subjected to lots of old and/or scary films, that will have to wait until next year, I suppose. But I’ll be doing at least something a little topical with a few horror-themed Top 10s.
First up, spiders. Now, I’m not scared of spiders, I just fucking hate the little shits. The way they skitter about, can seemingly climb anything (other than bathtubs, suckers) and just have far too many legs than any living creature should. So many joints! If I could select one species to be wiped clean from the Earth, I’d pick spiders in a heartbeat. Actually, I’d pick daddy-longlegs (otherwise known as crane flies) because they’re just as horrifyingly hateful as spiders, except they can fly, and have seemingly no real purpose or knowledge of their surroundings. They just float around, this way and that, not giving two shits about where you are and how many rolled up socks you’re throwing at them. Fuck crane flies. Sorry, I got a little side-tracked there.
Spiders are evil, hateful demons from the dusty, unswept corners of Hell, who purposefully leave cobwebs across doors or alleyways, just for me to walk through and become semi-cocooned in. And I’m not the kind of guy to trap it under a glass and release it back into the wild. No, those spiders came into the house for a reason; they like it in here. And if you let them outside, they’re just gonna come straight back in again. Therefore, the only resort is arachnicide, preferably via flip-flop. There’s no need to be unnecessarily cruel here – I’m not the kid from Chronicle – I get it over with quickly, and hope that all the other spiders get the message. I think I’ve rambled on long enough now. Proof of just how horrible spiders are can be clearly seen in how often they appear in films as monsters. As such, here’s my top 10 movie spiders. Oh, and I’ve immediately disqualified Eight Legged Freaks and Arachnophobia, because there’s nothing but spiders in those films, and I can barely remember them.
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